Helping co counselors start to like each other again…

July 16th, 2024

Helping Co-Counselors like each other again. A little…

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It has been hot. So damn hot.

It’s that time of summer where your staff are tired, getting a little cranky with other staff, and mostly know what to do but don’t always want to do it.

To be honest, it’s getting to the part of the summer where you are tired, getting a little - just a little - cranky with other staff, and you know what to do but don’t always want to do it.

That’s ok.

The work you do impacts individuals every day. If you haven’t been thanked yet today for bringing people together, making people smile, and giving kids and staff a chance to see what they are capable of… THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

Keep reading for

Co Counselor Reset Framework

Two Tokens Leadership inspired by Apple

Quick Poll

If you are an Exec or Owner interested in meeting up with other people like you respond to this email “Keep me in the loop”

Facts, Feelings, Future

Co-Counselor Check Ins

You did a great job training your staff. They mostly get camp. They know what to do and are getting into the swing of it. Now they are starting to have a shorter fuse with their co-counselors/fellow activity staff.

Let’s help them get back on the same page, get back to basics, and lower the temperature.

This idea was inspired from my conversation with Becky Alford at Kingsling Pines and Carolyn Harari at URJ Jacobs Camp’s 3F framework. Both badass Number 2’s.

If you know a badass Number 2 please subscribe to the Number 2 School newsletter.

Have your staff take a sheet of paper, fold it in thirds, and write at the top of each section. Facts - Feelings - Future. Spend 24 hours writing 3-5 bullet points in each category about what is going on for them as it relates to their co-counselors. Then sit down and talk with your co’s about what’s up for you. Just get back on the same page.

FACTS

How has time off been working? What about bus drop off? Bed time? Do you have specific kids that are having a hard time?

You aren’t here to blame, just notice what is real and try to write it and then say it without blaming anyone.

FEELINGS

What’s your energy level? How are you feeling about the facts? Are you frustrated? Excited? Nervous?

This is about you. How are you specifically feeling?

FUTURE

What might happen in the future? What do you want? Ideas to make it better?

It’s ok not to have the perfect answer. Think about what might work. What might you ask your cos to change or what can you all do as a group to be different?

Link to a printable version of this.

I want to be realistic. Asking your 18 year old staff to be able to have these conversations without some support might be tricky. You might need your unit leaders to help facilitate this. The key is building a framework to let your staff start to solve some of their own problems.

Ways I have seen this work

You announce the 3F check in’s at your next staff meeting and leave it up to your counselors to do it on their own

Have your village heads work with each co group to implement them

Run a division meeting where the conversation is facilitated as a division instead of as a bunk or smaller group

Help they say things like, this has been happening a little, or not all the time, but some times. A lot of our staff are conflict averse and need help scaffolding these conversations.

Quick aside - HOW COOL IS CAMP?!

You are helping young leaders learn how to have reasonable conversations with coworkers. You are helping shift from sweeping conflict under the rug to conflict as a space for innovation. Helping them shift from me against you to us against the problem.

I know it doesn’t feel like that when you have to hear for the 100th time about someone being late back from off time or how this person is stepping on my toes, AND that is what you are doing. Camp is a leadership academy as much or more for our staff than the campers. Thank you again for sweating, often literally, through this.

Two Tokens Leadership

Apple famously has a customer service philosophy pioneered by Jean-Louis Gassée at Apple France they call Two Tokens Customer Service.

“When a customer brings a complaint, there are two tokens on the table: It’s Nothing and It’s Awful. Both tokens are always played, so whoever chooses first forces the other to grab the token that’s left. For example: Customer claims something’s wrong. I try to play down the damage: It’s Probably Nothing…are you sure you know what you’re doing? Customer, enraged at my lack of judgment and empathy, ups the ante: How are you boors still in business??

But if I take the other token first and commiserate with Customer’s complaint: This Is Awful! How could we have done something like this? Dear Customer is left with no choice, compelled to say Oh, it isn’t so bad…certainly not the end of the world..””

Basically, if you take the problem extremely seriously the customer, or staff member, almost has no choice but to say “Oh it’s not that big a deal.”

At Camp Champions, JB will tell you one of the highest forms of praise is being a leader “Where problems go to die.”

When someone brings me what I think of as a small problem, I am often extremely tempted to just brush it off. Thinking that if I model that it isn’t a big deal then it won’t be a big deal. Sometimes that works, and I am finding more and more it can send a message that I don’t care or that I am not taking the problem seriously.

Instead of “that’s not really a big deal” try

“Damn. That is big. How can I help?”

”Woah! Tell me more. How can we make that easier?”

“WHAT!? What do you want to do about it?”

”Well shit… let me look into it and see what I can do”

A lot of times it isn’t a big deal. Most of the time your staff know it isn’t a big deal. Most of the time they just want to feel heard.